Fiction Contest > August 2004: Oh, the Things I'll Do for Chocolate

"I'm not going to do it."

"Chicken."

"I'm not being a chicken, I'm trying to stay clothed!"

"Chicken."

"I'm not going to do it."

"That's probably because we haven't made it interesting for you yet."

James Potter held up a small velvet box. Sirius Black stared at him.

"If I do it, you'll marry me?" He asked, raising an eyebrow.

"No, you git," James said. Sirius put his hands together and mouthed 'Thank God'. James shook his head. Sirius flopped down on the bed, watching James. James opened up the small box and revealed a small card. Sirius took the card and read it aloud.

"'This card entitles the holder to free chocolate from the date November 1st to the date November 31st. During which time, the cardholder may take 1 box of 20 chocolates, 5 chocolate bars, or 10 seasonal chocolate items (items must be under 5 ounces), per day during designated time period. Thank you for shopping at Honeydukes,'" Sirius looked up at James. "For me?" James nodded.

"For a price of course. Last night, you bragged to the girls that you would do any dare and called them 'chicken' for not doing some of the more interesting ones. Well tonight's your night. All you have to do is walk around the school completely naked except for my invisibility cloak for two hours," James said, grinning, "And, I wouldn't get caught if I were you. You wouldn't want your mum to know." Sirius thought over his proposition. He smiled and extended his hand.

"Prongs, mate, you have yourself a deal." The two boys shook on it, and it was a done deal.

Later that night, after almost everyone had gone to sleep, James and Sirius stayed up. Sirius took off his shirt and was reaching for his pants when James stopped him. He held out a black marker. Sirius looked at him.

"What are you going to do with that? You're going to write on me, aren't you?" James nodded and Sirius shook his head. "That wasn't part of the deal!" he protested.

"C'mon Padfoot. Some writing that no one will even see is going to keep you from a month of chocolate?"

"Good point. Well, get on with it," he said, giving in and leaning back. James wrote across his chest and onto his stomach 'Will run Hogwarts naked for free chocolate'. Sirius rolled his eyes and proceeded to take off his pants. James looked the other way.

"Thanks," Sirius' voice said. He was under the cloak and completely invisible.

"I wasn't doing it for you, mate," James said, grinning. A pillow threw itself at his head.

Sirius skulked around the castle. It was very quiet when there weren't three other guys under there with you. He was thankful for that at the moment. But, still it was too quiet and he was too jumpy. Every little sound could be a teacher. He looked at his watch.

"Midnight," he thought to himself. "The teachers won't be around at this time." Sirius smiled, assuring himself of this. With that, he walked up the stairs to Gryffindor Tower and entered the Dormitory. But, not his own. He walked into the Girl's Dorm room.

He looked around. It looked pretty much the same as the boys' did, just…pinker. He went through Lily's things and took out her schoolbooks. On the cover, back, and selected pages of each of the notebooks, he wrote 'I love James Potter'. He wasn't stupid though, and was careful to disguise his handwriting as hers. He grinned and drew smiley faces with Mascara on all the girl's faces. He walked slowly and quietly downstairs.

Finding some paper and markers on the table by the fireplace in the common room, he had a brilliant idea. He took a roll of tape and taped them together to make one long piece. Then he took the red marker and wrote 'I love James Potter' across it. At the bottom, he wrote 'Love Lily Evans'. He grinned and walked out of Gryffindor towers for the second time that night.

Sirius ran up and down the many hallways of the school. He looked at his watch.

"Only 10 more minutes!" he thought, as he ran. He ran and ran and ran, having the time of his life. He came to almost the end of the hallway, when the cloak fell off. His eyes got wide as he tried to skid to a stop. He stopped, alright. He stopped right into Professor McGonagall.

Her eyes went as wide as saucers. She was stunned for a moment and neither of them said anything. Then she yelled,

"SIRIUS BLACK!" The whole castle shook. If this were in the muggle world, doves would have flown out of a tree and car alarms would be going off. But, this is the wizarding world, so a few wolves howled at the moon and the portraits laughed.

"Never in my years of teaching at this school have I ever encountered something as inexplicably stupid as this. What were you thinking? Why would you do such a thing?" she said, voice just above a whisper. As she spoke, she found it hard not to look at him. She snapped herself out of it and looked at his face. And…a little further down. Not that, you perverts.

"'Will run Hogwarts naked for free chocolate'," she read off his chest. "You are stupider than I thought," she said. She shook her head and sighed. "For sake of my own sanity, Mr. Black, I'm going to allow you to just go back to your dormitory and not punish you. I will however send a letter home to your mother." Sirius' eyes got wide.

"No! You can't do that! Please, don't. She'll kill me. I'll do anything. Detentions, writing on the chalkboard, actually doing your homework, anything!" McGonagall smiled slightly, still unable to pull her eyes away from him.

"I bet you a month's worth of chocolate, you can't go one week without causing me grief," she said. "One month's chocolate and I won't call your mother." Sirius sighed.

"Oh, the things I do for chocolate," he groaned.

6 MONTHS LATER

From: the_Muffin_of_DOOM
Ok...here's my question......Have you guys ever gone naked under the invisibility cloak? Just asking.

Sirius: I thought we went over this one already...

James: But it's fun tormenting you.

Peter: How did you end up naked under there, Padfoot?

Sirius: ...I'd rather not talk about it.

James: Then I will. It was a dare. Bet him a month's worth of chocolate if he wouldn't do it. Of course he did.

Sirius: And McGonagall caught me. *hides*

All: *laugh uproariously*

Remus: I wish I could have seen the look on McGonagall's face.

James: I know! It wasn't all bad, though, mate. You did get two months of chocolate out of it.

Sirius: Think about it Prongs. Which would you rather: One month of Chocolate and you have your dignity or two and McGonagall seeing you completely naked?

James: *thinks*

Sirius: ...

James: *thinks*

Sirius: Prongs!

James: Yeah, I guess the first one.

Remus: -_-; I miss my sanity more than ever at times like these.