Ask the Marauders > September 17, 2003

From: Laurel
To all: If you were a fairy tale princess, who would you be and why?

Boys: WHAT?!

Lily: *laughs* What? You're not all pretty, pretty princesses?

James: Lils, do we look like princESSES to you?

Sirius: Do you really want her to answer that?

James: ...I have a little more faith in her.

Lily: *grins* Just answer the question.

Remus: I'm not answering this one.

James: I plead the Fifth.

Sirius: That's an American thing, you git. But I'm with you, Prongs. This is silly.

Lily: No fun. :P

From: Philomela Fairfax
All of you (Lily doesn't have to answer, if she doesn't wan't to) are you righthanded or lefthanded? Strange question, maybe, but I need for a fic I'm writing. If there are any grammar mistakes in this text, let's blame it on that I'm only 13, Swedish and my dear English dictionary is gone (do you have any ideas where it could be?).

Sirius: I'm righthanded.

James: Me too.

Remus: Me three.

Peter: Lefty, myself.

From: B-chan
If the moon was really made of cheese, would Remmy turn into a werewolf whenever a large block of cheese was around?

Sirius: *snickers* Now that would be a huge problem, wouldn't it?

James: For who? Moony or Wormtail?

Sirius: Never thought of that. Both?

Remus: It wouldn't be a big problem. In order for the supposed block of cheese to make me turn into a werewolf, it'd have to be a block of cheese shaped exactly like the full moon.

From: Emmie
I just want to now who answers all the questions? Are Harry,Ron and Hermione in on this to?

Sirius: Um, it's mostly myself, Prongs, Moony, Wormtail and Lils, with the occasional appearance from Malfoy and Snape.

James: For reasons unbeknownst to us.

Remus: Read the dictionary finally, Prongs?

From: Thunder Storm
Ahem! Ahem!, Every has to answer this. *Get on knees and begs* Please! Please, even Severus. Okay, what's your favorite spell?

James: There's this one really fun one that we learned in Transfiguration where you can change snakes into bunny rabbits. That one's always fun for messing with the Slytherins. Lots of them own snakes. *evil grin*

Sirius: The tinking charm. And oldie, but a goodie. Ah, the number of times and shades we've made Snape tink... *remembers fondly*

Remus: The silencing charm. It's useful for making sure the Slytherins can't whine about whatever we did to them, as well as using on Padfoot whenever he is being a tad annoying.

Lily: Every countercurse for everything this lot does, I guess. Mostly countercharms, which I'm getting rather good at creating, since I have them to keep up with.

Peter: The Summonding Charm. Helps me find things when I keep misplacing them. *sheepish grin*

Snape: I prefer to work with potions, although I am fond of using every curse I know on those Gryffindor idiots.

Sirius: Feeling the love. *evil grin*

From: Leslie
Peter- Will you please be my manicure buddy? We'd be building bridges- one manicure at a time!

Peter: *stares* Manicure?

Sirius: That thing girls do to make their nails all nice and stuff.

Peter: Umm......as long as I don't have to paint my nails?

Remus: I'd pay to see that, actually...

From: Shindig
Hello! What are your shoe sizes? :D Yipee!

James: Sizes are different in England than in America, so for the sanity of the webmistresses, we'll be replying with American sizes. *smiles* Oh, and 11 1/2 for me.

Sirius: *grins* 12, here.

Remus: 11 for me.

Peter: *sigh* 9 1/2. I'm not a very large person.

Lily: I'm 7 1/2, which is pretty average for women's sizes. Which also makes buying shoes difficult when the pair you want is sold out in your size. *sigh*

James: Lils, wizard-made shoes fit to your feet. Quite helpful. *grins*

From: Tony
Severus. What is your hygenic dysfunction?? WHY CAN'T YOU JUST WASH YOUR HAIR??!! (On a side note, have you ever tried a purple feather boa to accent the pink hair?)

Sirius: *laughs hysterically* Hygenic dysfunction?! There's a new one!

Remus: Do you actually know what that means, Padfoot?

Snape: I see that you are intelligent enough to use a dictionary. It IS rather hard to wash one's hair when potions have to be brewed so carefully that being one minute off in adding an ingredient can ruin the whole mixture. As for the feather boa, I will never even consider wearing one of those ugly things.

Sirius: That can be changed....

From: Remus Roxy
Remus you are quite possibly the sweetest person ever born, Sirius your just so damn loveable. But my question in for all of you, SNAPE YOU TOO! What do you wear to bed? Or do you wear anything?

Sirius: Contrary to popular belief, I wear pajama pants to bed.

James: Ugh, popular belief would scar me for life. I wear pants and a t-shirt usually. Shorts in the summer if it's really hot out.

Remus: T-shirt and pants. It helps hide the scar left by the wolf bite.

Peter: I've got plaid pajamas that my mom keeps buying for me. *sigh*

Lily: I've pink pajamas. Long sleeved for winter and a tank top for summer. But always pj pants.

From: Trish
So, tell me: How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

Sirius: I don't know, but if a tree falls in the forest, and no one's there to hear it, does it still hit Snape in the head?

James: That made no sense.

Sirius: Yeah, but it's a good question.

James: ...we should test it.

Remus: Provided I'm there to silence the slimeball after he realizes that we made the tree fall on him.

From: wolfie_luver
Hi guys! I wanted to ask the one question every Hogwarts student needs the answer to. What's the best hex to hit a cheating Slytherin with?

James: If it's in McGonagall's class, just tell her and it's even MORE fun.

Sirius: But otherwise, try a couple sparks to their rear if they're in front of you. Make'em jump sky high.

Lily: That calls too much attention to yourself. Try a Invisibility charm on their quill. Makes writing a bit harder.

James: Heh, didn't know you had it in you, Lils.

Lily: I don't condon cheating.

Remus: Or you could charm their paper to yell every time they write on it. *grins*

From: Jessie
If you could be anyone else in the world for 2 days, who would you be?

Sirius: Being a rock star would be fun. *grins* All those cute groupies...

James: *rolls eyes* I think I'd like to give being a football* player a try. Muggles seem to enjoy it emmensely.

Remus: I'd like to be a librarian, actually. You can read a lot in two days.

*Note: We're using the international meaning of football, in other words soccer.

From: Lisa
Please tell me that you guys can cook SOMETHING. C'mon, microwavable Hot Pockets? Leftovers? You can't all be THAT bad...

Lily: NO.

James: But Lily...

Lily: NO! N. O.

Sirius: She's still mad about that incident with the miniwave, isn't she?

Lily: It's MICROwave, and yes I am. You blew it up!

James: We didn't mean to. You didn't tell us to take the silver stuff off the butter.

Lily: You're lucky no one was hurt and that my parents didn't kill the two of you!

Remus: At least I can cook somewhat...I'm limited to toast and pancakes.

James & Sirius: PANCAKES! *_* Moony makes great pancakes!