Ask the Marauders > November 18, 2005

From: Gothalchemy
Do you believe in the matrix?

James: Are we talking about the matrix or the Matrix?

Sirius: Is there really a difference?

Lily: Well, a matrix is something that you use in math, logic or computer programming, which are all admittedly related.

Peter: Though I'd gather from the use of 'the' in front of 'matrix' that Gothalchemy meant the Matrix movie(s).

Remus: I second what Peter said.

Lily: Then, well, I don't believe in it. I don't believe anything that Keanu Reeves thinks is real. Haven't had any mind-altering drugs to convince me otherwise. But I believe in matrices. They're useful.

Remus: Keanu Reeves is not a great actor, so I'll vote against the Matrix.

From: bubblisious
When you boys were coming up with nick-names what were some of the rejects?

Sirius: Prongs wouldn't let us call him Rudolph.

James: *sigh* Not that it ever stopped you.

Sirius: Nothing stops me!

James: Drapery does.

Sirius: ...you're lucky I like you, Prongs.

James: *grins* Yup.

Remus: I think someone wanted to call Sirius 'Mangy Mutt'...besides people he frightened.

From: Cheese rocks!
Remus, if you could cure your lycanthropy by giving up chocolate, what would you do?

Remus: Honestly, by now lycanthropy is something I've learned to accept as part of who I am. So I guess I wouldn't change anything.

James: Are you just saying that because you like chocolate so much?

Sirius: I think he's being careful in his answer since it's so unlikely.

Lily: Too bad the cure isn't so simple as that.

From: Innocent Bystander
What are your favorite flowers?

James: Lilies. *grins*

Lily: *laughs* That's rather sacchrine...

James: But it's true. You are my favorite flower.

Sirius: I am going to vomit.

Peter: That was blunt.

Remus: And very Prongs.

Peter: Actually, I was talking about Padfoot, but Prongs' answer is blunt, too.

Sirius: Yet oddly true. I, however, don't have a particular flower that I like. Though snapdragons are interesting. You can make'em talk!

Peter: Enchant them to talk, or manually?

Sirius: Both, actually. *grins*

Remus: As far as flowers go, I like small wild roses.

From: ez2cimaqt
Lily I am having boy troubles. How do you deal with boys' big egos?

Lily: Well, I usually ignore James when he's being an insufferable prat. They *normally* will learn to stop when you don't pay any attention to them. Boys act like morons to get a girl's attention, though it never really works in the way they expect if the girl has any sense.

James: You don't *always* ignore me....

Lily: I did mostly for 6 years. When I wasn't threatening you with detention.

Sirius: Or lecturing him.

Lily: I had a duty as a prefect to try and stop his stupidity.

Remus: Key word being 'try'.

James: You can't stop stupidity. It's a force of nature.

Lily: Sadly...

From: Mrs. Potty
Before Hogwarts, did your parents teach you how to read and write, or did they hire someone to do the job?

James: Learned at home. When I wasn't 'running amok' as my mum liked to call it. Magical children are taught at home because they can't really be trusted to control their magical abilities properly around muggle children.

Remus: My mum taught me to read and write.

Sirius: Regulus and I had a tutor. Rather mean-spirited old woman, too.

Lily: I went to primary school like most muggleborns.

From: Dorks United
How many ornaments can you hang on Prong's antlers?

James: What?!

Sirius: Wow, that's one we haven't thought to try yet! Thanks!

James: You can't be serious.

Sirius: I can and I am. *grins*

Remus: *sigh*

Peter: He really never tires of that pun, does he?

Sirius: Doesn't matter. Prongs, get to changing so we can start hanging ornaments on your antlers!

James: ...do I even have to dignify that with a no?

Lily: *sigh*

Remus: Wait for Christmas. Then we can try that.

From: Zero
Sirius, please, please, please, tell me! Do you have more intelligence than people give you credit?

Sirius: *blinks* Who thinks I'm stupid?

James: Other than everyone? *grins*

Sirius: You think I'm stupid?

James: Nah, I just think you're daft.

Sirius: Ah, well you're daft, too, so it works.

Lily: Sirius is actually very intelligent. He's just a bit immature.

Remus: In short, he's a typical male.

Sirius: Ha ha! There is nothing typical about me!

From: Snuffles Lover
For the boys: What is the worst thing a fangirl has ever done to you? Please answer!

Peter: Other than the calls for my head?

Sirius: Popping up out of closets and around corners at me to tackle me to the ground can get a bit...annoying?

James: I think pairing me with Snape would go on that list. Pairing any of us with Snape, for that matter.

Remus: Other than proposing to me and constantly claiming that they don't care about my lycanthropy?

From: Aristoteles
Why is Snape?

Sirius: Why is Snape what? A git? Greasy?

James: Not on fire?

Remus: Antisocial?

Peter: Wearing girl's underwear?

James & Sirius: *stare*

Sirius: Wow. Nice, Pete!

Peter: *grins* I try.

From: remus roks out loud, woo!
Hello. Okay, I know you've already been asked about who's been ticklish. But who else is, since the main focus seemed to be James on that one. Remus, are you?

James: Should we investigate or simply ask?

Sirius: Do you want to tickle the werewolf?

James: It's not like he would bite us or anything.

Remus: Har har. No tickling me.

Sirius: Boo. Bad show, Moony. Bad show!

From: Ruckles
Have any of you snuck something into the Slytheren table food when the house elves weren't looking?

Sirius: We've done that more times than we can count!

James: And yes, before you say anything, we can count higher than ten. *rolls eyes*

Lily: *grins*

Remus: It was always interesting to see what new potions we could introduce into their pumpkin juice.

Sirius: The trick was to get the house elves to trust us, though that was easy enough...

James: They love Peter, so he'll distract them for us while we 'spice' up the Slytherin food.

Peter: *sigh* I was just friendly to the house elves...

From: Cassandra
So, where exactly are you guys?

Sirius: Wherever you want us to be. *wiggles eyebrows*

James: *snigger* How many times as a creepy line like that even worked, Padfoot?

Sirius: You'd be surprised.

Lily: Actually, I doubt we would be.

Peter: But she does pose a valid question. Where are we?

James: How could you forget, Wormtail? We're in the Room of Requirement.

Remus: Didn't you recognize the walls around here?

James: To be truthful, though, the walls to tend to change around here...

Lily: Then how does Snape get in here when you're already in here?

Sirius: ...we keep'im around? I mean, we imagined this whole place, so could we have feasibly imagined that Snape could get in here?

James: Wow...that's actually a bit logical!

Sirius: Amazing, isn't it? *grins*

Remus: Plus Angie and Robyn find their way in here on occasion. We had to leave it open for them as well.