Ask the Marauders > March 5, 2004

From: Flame
Hello everybody! I was just wondering (And this may be a difficult question but...), if that evil Umbridge woman went against Sirius's mum, who would win?

Sirius: Yikes, that's a tough one.

James: Yeah, his mum can get MEAN...

Lily: And yet the Umbridge woman is plain awful in Book Five...

Remus: But I think Sirius's mum has some dirtier curses ready...and has no qualms about using them.

From: A person who does not exist
What kind of websites would there be if there was an internet for wizards?

Sirius: P...

Lily: Don't.

Sirius: But...

Lily: NO.

Sirius: *pouts* Fine.

James: Quidditch fansites, some spell encyclopedias, Daily Prophet garbage. Kinda like the Muggle internet, I suppose.

Remus: And a lot of 'homework help' sites.

From: iloveremus;D
Hello Everyone! You guys are awesome! Ok Ive been wondering about this for awhile.... Do any of you have any pets?

Lily: I have a cat.

James: Which doesn't like mohawks. Heh.

Lily: *glowers*

James: I've an owl, and I think Padfoot does, too.

Sirius: Yeah, though it's pretty lazy.

James: Sounds right. *evil grin*

Remus: *laughs* I'm fond of my cat, although I've managed to keep them from giving it mohawks.

From: curious
Just for future reference, what kinds of questions do you guys like answering the most??

James: Ones that we a) haven't answered before...

Sirius: b) Make us think of really ridiculous answers...

Lily: c) Ask serious questions about life or about the books, something that we can really think about...

Remus: And d) are grammatically legible.

From: kindered spirit
Sirius, you said that Harry was a lot like James, but I would say he's more like YOU. Do you agree?

James: Be glad there are no mini-Padfoots running about.

Sirius: There really shouldn't be more than one me at time in the world, huh?

Lily: Definitely not. The world couldn't handle it.

Remus: Not even both the Wizarding world and the Muggle world could handle more than one of him!

From: Rally friends
Have you ever swallowed a flobberworm for a one-pound bet?

Sirius: No, but I'll consider it.

James: That's gross, mate.

Sirius: A little ketchup will solve that. Heh.

Remus: Gross does not describe the disgusting-ness of that.

From: Pandora
Hello, I'm just wondering, what did you guys do for Valentine's Day? My V-day sucked. My aunt and I went skiing. I hope yours was better......

James: *dumb grin*

Sirius: By the nauseating look at Prongs' face, I'm assuming he and Lils had some romantic evening and a touch of snogging.

Lily: Gee, thanks Sirius. That was sweet...up until the last part.

Sirius: I, on the other hand, was deluged by a lot of scary girls. Me, Moony and Wormtail hid out for most of the day, though we did pull of a bit of festive cheer for the Slytherins. Pink really does brighten up their common room...

Remus: Red and gold also helped brighten up that room.

From: GB
If all you marauders suddenly woke up as the opposite genders and you couldn't switch back, what would you do?

Sirius: *evil evil evil evil evil grin*

James: *ignoring whatever Sirius is thinking about* Well, if Lils was switched too, I guess that wouldn't be so bad...though rather odd for a while, and hard to explain to our parents...

Remus: *hits Sirius with his book* Don't you dare say it, Sirius. And it would be really strange to be a girl...although I think I could get used to it.

From: anonymous
Can I buy a vowel?

James: How much you offering?

Remus: And which vowel do you want to buy?

From: Asiarr
White Stripes or Tenacious D?

Peter: Tenacious who? Those sound like diseases.

Sirius: *as doctor* I'm sorry, sir, but you have a raging case of Tenacious D.

James: *as patient* No! Not Tenacious D! *mock faints*

Remus: Better a case of Tenacious D than a case of White Stripes. Although we should do that to some of the Slytherins....

From: Desperate to Know
What do the voices inside your head say?

Sirius: I am the walrus, coo-coo-ka-choo!

Remus: *raises eyebrow*

From: Magic Chic
Has Sirius ever gotten overly hyper?

James: Please see the previous answer for your proof that he's ALWAYS overly hyper.

Remus: Frankly, we're worried when he's NOT overly hyper.

From: Vengefulprincipal
I know you guys get in trouble a lot... so what's the wierdest detention you ever had to do?

Peter: I had to give Mrs. Norris a bath.

James & Sirius: Eeeewww!

Peter: Which was why I was in the hospital wing for a day afterwards. *sigh*

Remus: Ouch....

From: AAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!
Where's the cream filling?

Sirius: Wouldn't you like to know?

James: He probably ate it.

Remus: Whatever it was that had the cream filling...

From: KeithMoonfan88
Do you guys like The Who?

James: Who?

Sirius: That's *The* Who, Prongs.

James: But who's The Who?

Sirius: The Who are The Who, you git.

Lily: *irritated sigh* I like them. They're a band, and you're both gits.

Remus: Lily, they've always been gits.

From: I Know You, But You Don't Know Me.....
AWKWARD SILENCE!!!!!!

ALL: @_@

Sirius: How did this get through Robyn & Angie's screening?

James: Heck if I know. Maybe they're too tired from midterms and other responsible-type stuff.

Remus: I think that's most likely.

Angie: --;; Thanks a lot guys...and for the record I do not have midterms right now. Just figuring out employment stuff and trying to graduate...

Robyn: Oi, oi! I have midterms, too! And I have to go order my cap and gown. @_@ But I may have a roommate for an apartment for post-graduation. :D

From: Avivagirl88
Who am I?

Sirius: *points to the 'From' line*

From: tomoko
Dear Peter: Recently there has been some arguments about you. So, how do you feel right now?

Peter: Well, it's nice to know that there are people who don't downright hate me. Being that Robyn & Angie can only write me with what they know from the current five books out, it really does seem like I'm no good. But it's really awesome that some people have more faith in humanity than that. I know what I did was awful, and there's nothing I can do to change that, but be that as it may, I'm still human, still a Marauder, and this is a Marauder-era website, so naturally I'd like to be included more. It's up the Robyn & Angie what happens, but thanks to everyone for their support. *smiles*

From: Tarantula Blackwiddow
My friend has a theory. She says that it was Severus that Bertha Jorkins caught while he was kissing some girl named Florence behind the greenhouse (this was metioned somwhere in the books). Do any of you know anything about it?

Sirius: Snape?

James: Kissing?

Both: A GIRL?

Lily: It's not that far out of the question. After all, everyone needs affection from other people sometimes, even Severus, I bet.

Remus: Lily, this is SNAPE...who has a personality worse than most animals I encounter.

From: Scarlett
Snape: Well, now that we have the GRYFFINDORS' opinion, what would you name YOUR child?

Snape: I do not have time for your stupid questions. But if you must know, it would probably be some old family name, or the woman who bore the child would pick out something equally innocuous.

Remus: *chuckles* Figures...

From: Your good friend, the biased Blaise Zabini
Lily, if a man yells in the forest, and there's no woman there to hear him, is he still wrong?

Lily: *laughs* Yes, of course he is!

James: *sigh* Never could win an arguement with her.

Sirius: Like you've ever seriously tried.

James: *sticks tongue out at Sirius*

Remus: Why WOULD Prongs try?

James: To get a rise out of her, of course.

Lily: You want to make me angry?

James: ...but you're cute when you're angry. *smiles*

Sirius: She could be beating you senseless and you'd still say she was cute, Prongs. Face it, you're no longer a free man...

Lily: I get the impression that it's not such a bad thing...

James: *grins*