Ask the Marauders > November 19, 2003

From: Silver Arrow
If Moony, Padfoot, and Prongs were having a race, who would win?

Remus: Probably Prongs. His deer mind freaks out at the sight of Moony.

James: ...not funny. You're just jealous that deer are more fleet-footed than wolves.

Sirius: Admit it mate, your other half bolts when it sees Moony.

James: ...

From: Kate Black
Everyone has got to answer this, Snape if you don't answer this I'll curse you to the land of shampoo!!!! Anyway, how long did you guys sleep with a toy/blankie?

Remus: I had a plush wolf that I slept with until I encountered that live one.

Lily: I had a teddy bear that someone gave me when I was a baby. I think I still have it sitting on my dreser back home.

James: Padfoot still has a stuffed lion from when he was five.

Sirius: *blushes slightly* So what? Wormtail still sleeps with a blanket!

Peter: I get cold at night! *flushes red*

Snape: Your petty threats do not faze me in the least, and I am also appalled that you would think that I would need to sleep with either a toy or a hideous blankie!

James: *whispers to the others* I bet he does, though. *winks*

From: i'm a slytherin
It took God 7 days to create the world. How long would it have taken any of you?

Remus: I don't like the sound of this question...

Sirius: But I am...

Lily: No.

Sirius: *pouts*

Lily: *smiles*

James: Hmmm...I think it would have taken longer, just because we would have been either procrastinating or screwing around making strange animals. *sweatdrops*

Remus: Or maybe because we were making sure things were not as messed up as they are now?

From: xXSchizoStarfishXx
What do you all think of beards?

Sirius: Good for hiding things in?

James: There's an interesting idea. Wonder what Dumbledore's got hiding in his!

Sirius: Hey Pete! Transform and go find out.

Peter: Last time you sent me on one of these missions, something in Hagrid's pockets nearly ate me.

Sirius: Heh, oh yeah. Sorry about that, mate.

Remus: I know nothing about what they are planning.

James: You must have missed the memo.

From: Georgia
Hey all, whats your favorite holiday?

Remus: I like Christmas a lot.

Sirius: Christmas is FUN! But that April Fools' Day holiday is great. It's the prankster's Christmas. *evil grin*

James: I rather like New Year's. At least then Padfoot can't torment me by levitating misletoe over my head when Lily's around.

Sirius: Aw, that was only fun when she wasn't dating you, Prongs. Now she'll kiss you at the drop of a hat.

Lily: Jealous, Sirius? And I like Christmas since I get to spend time with my family and the decorations are beautiful.

Sirius: You wish, Lils.

From: Kayleigh
What's the most original e-mail you guys have ever received?

James: That would be the pirate email.

Lily: Or the woodchuck email.

Sirius: The poetry email, though I was rather fond of the pirate one myself. Yarr!

Remus: The poetry email, and Padfoot, stop talking like a pirate.

Sirius: *pouts* You're not fun, Moony.

From: Shelbiekins
What is the best part about Quidditch?

James: The *best* part? Hmm...

Sirius: He'll be here for a while. I'd have to say beating the Slytherins.

James: *still thinking*

Peter: Give it up, Prongs. You won't be able to settle on one single thing.

James: Heh, I guess not. *sheepish grin*

Sirius: *sigh* The only thing he likes better is probably Lils.

Lily: I should hope so. *grins*

From: nina
Why are we here?

Lily: Because this place is just as good as any other.

Sirius: To bask in my wonderfulness!

James: Self-centered much?

Sirius: Nah, just a little. *grins*

Remus: Just a little he says...

Sirius: What is this, "Beat up on Sirius" day?

James & Remus: Yes. *grins*

Sirius: ...

From: Victoria Isis Lupin
Ok, so, Mischef Night is night before Halloween, got any pranks planned? I'm sorry that the spell checker doesn't like Remus' name enough. ^.^ It doesn't like mine either....

Remus: I'm not the only one!

Sirius: We could send Trogdor after the spell checker...

James: I guess that would work as he's already inside the computer.

Sirius: And we had lots of fun, as usual, on Mischief Night. Though I think McGonagall may still be a bit mad about her shoes up and doing the cha-cha with her still in them at breakfast the next morning. *snickers*

From: Your good friend, the biased Blaise Zabini
Are you pondering what I'm pondering?

Remus: "I think so, Brain, but where would we find rubber pants that big?"

James & Sirius: *stares*

James: You okay, mate?

Sirius: How big a pair of rubber pants are we talking?

James: *stares*

Sirius: What? It's a valid question. You'd just have to get one pair of rubber pants and use an Engorgio charm on them to make them as big as you want.

James: *sigh* The things that come out of his mouth sometimes...

Remus: *sweatdrops* It's not my fault that Angie likes this cartoon about two lab mice, one of whom wants to take over the world.

Sirius: Hey now, Robyn's stuck on this Full Metal Alchemist show right now. You're not the only one plagued with random cartoons.

From: Anonymous
What will the weather be like next Saturday?

James: What is this, the Weather Channel?

Sirius: 60 degrees and sunny.

Peter: What makes you so sure?

Sirius: I just said it's going to be 60 degrees and sunny. I didn't say where. *winks*

Remus: He has a point.

From: A person
Can I ask you a really stupid question?

Sirius: Does that one count? If it does, you just did. *grins*

James: I'd have to say that a lot of ths questions we answer are pretty stupid. Though our answers are just as stupid if not more so.

Sirius: As your poetry showed.

James: Sod off about the poetry already. *red*

Remus: The most stupid questions we get were those various proposals and such.

From: Spellman
Heh, ok we know that James can't write poetry (and I don't think I'll ask about everyone else writing poetry), but can you guys write songs? (Maybe Sirius came up with some in the shower? *snickers*)

Remus: Padfoot can't write songs. Or sing, for that matter.

James: I give up. Yes, I suck at writing poetry. But at least I don't sing horribly off-key in the shower like Padfoot does.

Sirius: If you think I sound bad in there, you should hear me sing elsewhere!

Peter: They do say that the acoustics in the bathroom make just about anyone sound better than they normally do.

Remus: Padfoot, just warn me next time you start singing so I can be OUT of earshot.

From: Laura
Sirius, since you have a pirate obsession (And, you're not the only one matey.), did you like Pirates of the Caribbean? And if so, why has the rum gone??

Sirius: I don't know! I wish it would come back though! But until then, we can share a pint or two of butterbeer. *winks* And that movie was great.

James: He made us go see it three times.

Sirius: You enjoyed it too. You said the girl was cute.

Lily: Oh?

James: Not as cute as you, though.

Lily: *laughs* Wasn't going for a compliment, but thanks sweetie.

Sirius: *snickers*

Remus: At least Prongs isn't getting on her bad side.

From: Ebba
Hi there, guys and dolls. I've got a question for Peter. When you're a rat, would you like to go on a date with my hamster, Jonnie? She's really nice and I think you'd make a cute couple. I also have a male-hamster, Gunnar, he's nice too. Sweden's not far from the U.K, come visit us, we'd be really pleased if you came (It's an invitation for ALL of you, not just Peter).

Peter: *blinks, then blushes* Thanks Ebba, but I would rather date someone of the human persuasion, being that I'm originally human. No offense to your hamster, though. I'm sure she's very nice. I'd like to come visit sometime, though.