Ask the Marauders > October 24, 2003

Click here to read the haiku question.

From: Monkey D. Luffy
I'm a pirate, Savvy? Okay, if a cheese walked into a bar and the bartender said "hi." and the cheese ...WHAT IS THE CAPITAL OF TAIWAN!? ::poke poke poke::

*silence*

Sirius: So, what’s the question here? Are you asking what would happen of a cheese went into a bar and asked the bartender that question, or are you asking what the capital of Taiwan is?

James: And here I thought cheese was all knowing.

Sirius: Nah, that’s Dumbledore.

Remus: Possibly that person started telling a joke and then asked their question in the middle of it? And the capital of Taiwan is Taipei for anyone who's interested.

From: Marauders rule
What are you all going to be for Halloween? Sirius- you don't count, we all know you'll be a pirate. Arrrr!

Sirius: Maybe I *won’t* be a pirate then! I could be a... A... A racecar driver!

James: Lils suggested I be a mechanic.

Peter: She just wants to get you into those jeans.

Sirius: And then out of them again.

Lily: SIRIUS BLACK, YOU TAKE THAT BACK! This is a PG-13 site!

Sirius: And we’re old enough, so what? :P

Lily: *fumes*

Remus: Lighten up a little, Lils.

From: Liz
Hi, I have a question (obviously) do sing one song in the shower or a medley of your favorite songs and in key or off key, and everyone does sing in the shower.

James: Padfoot sings in the shower... *snickers*

Sirius: I happen to have a nice singing voice. [And I sing just about anything.]

Peter: Not at the crack of dawn, you don’t. [Anything? Make that *everything*.]

Remus: Gotta agree with Peter on that one. I really don't fancy waking up to hearing Padfoot's singing.

From: brave sir robin
Where is the old man from scene 24?

James: ...huh?

Sirius: I AM THE OLD MAN FROM SCENE 24!

Peter: That’s impossible. You’re not old!

Sirius: I’m older than you!

Peter: But you weren’t old when that movie was made! You were only 15!

Sirius: ...I’m an old soul.

James: You’re just a git.

Sirius: But at least a loveable git. *grins*

Remus: Only to a certain female who shall remain nameless because I've mentioned her before.

From: Jennifer
Do the Marauders always have to cause trouble when not or when needed?

James: We always cause trouble!

Sirius: 24 hours a day!

James: 7 days a week!

Sirius & James: 365 days a year!

Remus: *sigh* I try be a good role model...I really do...

From: Cassiopeia Snuffles
Have you seen my English Dictionary?

Sirius: I think Moony ate it. *winks*

James: Or he threw it at the spellchecker.

Remus: Ha ha, very funny. *rolls eyes* And of course I wouldn't eat the book.

From: HGranger_126
What's with Remus's obsession with the spellchecker?

Remus: I just like things to be spelled correctly. And besides, this program is stupid. My name isn’t a misspelling. It’s from a Roman myth, for goodness sake!

Sirius: He’s a little touchy about this subject. He’s just jealous that the computer knows how to spell my name. *grins*

Remus: When your name is less commonly used than mine! *sighs*

Sirius: My name is just as cool as yours if not more so, Moony. Besides, I've got an astronomical name, so of course it gets used more than yours.

James: Astronomically big ego, you mean.

Sirius: Stuff it, Prongs.

From: Padfootfan
Ok, the long awaited question... why did the Marauders cross the road?

James: To get to the Zonko’s on the other side.

Remus: Well, you guys to Zonko's, me to Honeydukes. *grins*

From: Chrysta
If you could pick ONE word that you could describe yourself as... well what would that be?(*every one answer please!*)

Remus: One word? Hmm...mature.

Sirius: I guess 'dead sexy' is two words, huh? *grins*

James: You're a git. Can we use that for you?

Sirius: Just one word, and no we can't use 'git', Prongs. There's too many words to describe me.

Lily: Immature, annoying, loud, obnoxious, selfish...

Remus: We could consult the dictionary Padfoot thinks I ate.

Sirius: Feeling the love here...

James: *ignores this all* I think I'll have to go with 'athletic' since that's what everyone else will say. Heh. And for Lily, we should use 'beautiful'.

Lily: *smiles* Thanks.

From: Anonymous
Why?

Remus: Why what?

Sirius: Why not?

James: Why for art thou?

From: Steph
James- how bad is your vision without your glasses?

James: Awful. And if any of you make a joke... *glares at his friends*

Sirius: Nah, we've made all the jokes already. Finished'em off first year.

From: Macbeth W. Cauldrina
What are you going to be for Halloween?

Remus: Not gonna be anything.

Sirius: A pirate! *evil grin*

James: I think Robyn's slipping up. We answered this question twice in the same week.

Sirius: She's too distracted lately. I think we need to remedy this. *gets out wand* Where's that guy. I think his hair would be lovely in a shade of green...

Lily: *sigh* Boys...

From: Your good friend, the biased Blaise Zabini
Ok, ok, ok... Does DARK have a speed, too?

Peter: The speed of dark is equal to the slope of the tangent of y divided by the square root of the number of hairs on Snape’s head.

Others: *stare*

Peter: What?

Remus: That...was intelligent-sounding...

Peter: *all proud and stuff* Thanks.

From: Alice
If a tomato goes over a street, and gets run over of a car, what is the result?

Remus: Uh..this makes no sense...

James: When do these questions ever make sense?

Sirius: Wouldn't that be a squished tomato? Roadkill! Heh.

From: Patti
Do any of you write poetry?

James: Poetry? Hmmm, I wonder if Lily would like if I wrote her some poetry.

Sirius: Uh, Prongs...I don't think that's such a good idea.

James: Wait! I know! I could write her a haiku!

Remus: Do you even know what a haiku is?

James: It's that Japanese poem that's really, really short and easy to write, isn't it?

Remus: *sigh* A haiku is a poem composed 3 lines, with the syllable count being 5-7-5.

Sirius: Thank you Mr. Dictionary.

Remus: You're welcome. *grins*

Sirius: Right, so you actually think you could do that, Prongs?

James: Why not? Sounds easy enough. Let's see now...

Lovelier than cheese,
your hair gleams brighter than the
cleanest of snitches.

*silence*

James: Well?

Sirius: Mate, don't show her that. She may think you were coming on to Wormtail or something.

James: Padfoot, that was repulsive.

Remus: So was that poem. And I thought Lily had *red* hair...

James: Golden, red, it's nice and shiny. Besides, you try making a poem with only 5-7-5 syllables!

Remus: You broke line, by the way.

James: ...sod off.

Peter: I liked the part about the cheese...

Remus: *suffering sigh* Now everyone knows what I go through with this bunch.